A breakup letter
Dear Big Corporate World,
It’s over.
I think we’ve both known it for a while, but the time has finally come to call it a day.
Our relationship hasn’t been great for a long time now. Sure, it started off well – but I think most relationships do, you know? I was young and naive and you just seemed so important and sophisticated.
I’ll admit I was seduced by your promises and your power. You took me places I had never been. Flying me around in the pointy end of aeroplanes, staying in five star hotels, paying for expensive meals. You showered me with gifts and made me feel special. For a kid who grew up in small town New Zealand without much money you really were a dream come true.
For the first few years we were pretty happy together. Sometimes you were a bit overbearing and possessive, sure, but I just thought that was the way our sort of relationship worked.
It did upset me when you told me I couldn’t go out with my friends at night or on the weekends because you needed me so much, but I got used to it eventually. You told me that what we were doing together was really important, and I believed you.
It took a long time for the cracks to start showing. When once I’d looked forward to seeing you every day, I ended up resenting having to come and spend so much time with you. The shiny things I got from you started to look a lot more like bribes – and all of a sudden they just didn’t make me happy any more.
Slowly but surely I began to feel crushed. I was exhausted from having to spend so much time keeping up appearances for the sake of our relationship, pretending to be someone I no longer was. I couldn’t remember the last time you had made me feel genuinely happy, or I had done something that really inspired me instead of just what you told me to do.
I knew that things were getting bad when I stopped feeling committed to you. I’ll admit it, my eyes started to wander. Other people seemed to be happy in their relationships, though – why wasn’t I? I tried all sorts of things to make us work, but eventually I just couldn’t hide it any more.
It’s not you, it’s me. You know we’ve tried to break up more than once in the last few years. I left you for a few months back in 2008, remember? I needed a break and even though I came back to you eventually we both knew it was the beginning of the end.
So then there was last year. I walked out on you again in January and had never been happier. For ages I loved my newly single status, and when I grudgingly agreed to try to make us work one last time on a trial basis my heart just wasn’t in it.
And now we’re done.
I’m in Thailand these days, and it is amazing. There are so many people here who have broken up from toxic relationships just like ours. We are our own little support group really – except we don’t seem to need any support! I’ve never been around such a positive and happy bunch of people.
I think this single life really suits me.
This time I’m not coming back.
All the best for the future,
[Image via woodleywonderworks]
If you enjoyed this post please share it with your friends - it only takes a second but it makes a huge difference to me!
Awesome Dave. Keep it up and hopefully we will follow in your jandal-steps soon.
LOVE THIS.
Now that is the best breakup letter I have ever read
Cheers
Lisa
❤
Brilliant!
This is the letter that I’m in the process of writing for myself. I’m in the midst of planning a breakup within the next 12-18 months. I’m just starting to go through the process of working out what will fill the gap though….. Very inspiring!
Keep it up!
Awesome! This is priceless
Love love!
haha this is amazing!! glad you got out of your sour relationship. the corporate world never treated you right anyway.
This is great! Sometimes breaking up isn’t so hard to do after all:) I’ll be in Thailand for all of February and into March. Will you still be around?
Sure will be – no plans to leave here before mid April at the earliest
Come say hi!
Fantastic! Myself, I’m hoping never to enter into a relationship with the corporate world.
Dave, absolutely brilliant. I really admire you. I left Corporate employment in 2008 and have never been happier!
Congrats on following your bliss!!!
Here here! Found this post through Torre’s twitter, and certainly glad I did. Glad you’re following a path that’s right for you, it inspires me to find my own, keep it up!
Oh, to someday write this letter myself…
Dave I think this is the breakup letter that everyone wants to write one day. Good on you for having the courage to do it.
Superb!!!
Congrats! Enjoy your newly found freedom
Man I can relate to this… Luckily my job quit me before I quit it. Now it’s RTW time.
I can’t imagine going back. I know that Shaun and I have to go back to work and save again but I can’t imagine the cubicle anymore. It would be soul crushing. Love the post!
Hilarious! I can’t wait to break up with my job next year.
Kudos for leaving the grind! What’s next for you?
congratulations on your break up!!! enjoy your life as a back packer
[...] that is where the luck stops.Everything else is a choice. I work hard. I recently broke up with the corporate world, but when I was a part of it I worked hard. Now I am doing my own thing – and I’m [...]
love it!
[...] A breakup letter Share this:TwitterFacebookLike this:LikeBe the first to like this post. [...]
Wow, what a letter! I missed the “Dear Big Corporate World” line up top and at first I thought this was to an ex… Very powerful stuff
Also, I’ve read several posts, and for some reason I had thought until now you were American… I’m American, so I probably just assumed. Anyway, random thought to share.
Thanks Liz, glad you enjoyed it! And nope, definitely a Kiwi … my passport even says so
Congratulations! It’s so not easy to do and I’m sure you’ve been going nutty on the inside, but it’s the best thing in the world.
Have fun.
[...] A Breakup Letter by What’s Dave Doing? [...]
Thank you Dave! I just went through the same break up on Dec 7, 2011. I can relate to every word. Even though I have no savings, and I am not really sure what will happen next, I feel my life is finally starting to align with the priorities of my soul. Your letter gives me hope and inspiration.
I’m writing my break up letter April 1st!!! and then off to Central America!!! Happy travels!!!
Congratulations on taking this big leap! Looking forward to reading more about your adventures!
bravo, dave!! i am excited to follow your journey, online. you can do it!
thoroughly enjoyed this post. serioulsy! well done, dave. well done.
wow i love this post………..well done Dave i amso proud of u.well deone
Wow I just read the post and You said it so eloquently and I was in the same boat…My boat just took me to start my own business…I think it is something that has to come from the heart..I have to say that its not for everyone …
[...] world’.Meeting those people, having that experience, feeling that shared power was the final nail in the coffin of my corporate career. It has been eight months so far, and I can’t even imagine going back.For all of those [...]
Wow! You are so brave! Amazing..
So charming and funny. Love this letter.
fantastic
Great post
And the corporate world is brilliant for one primary purpose – to make some cash which usually entails trying to provide for a family or at the very least, paying back monstrous student loan debt. I appreciated it for what it was, and felt fortunate to have spent the time I did working decent paying jobs – especially as I was the single Mom to a young child at the time.
Think of it as just a step on your journey that helped you get to where you are now. When I left I knew one thing… make that two:
1. I wouldn’t be missed.
2. There was someone out there to take my spot who maybe needed it more than I
Oh this made me giggle. Then it made me panic! I’m about to start the reconciliation process! Is it really not going to work? Maybe I’ll just save the hassle and stay broken-up!!
Well I can say that it’s working pretty well for me so far…
Ok – I’m just adding to all the comments that praise how funny and clever (and true) this is.
It’s good to hear you’re feeling much happier. Sometimes I’ve wondered if people who are unhappy at home will still feel unhappy when they’re traveling. Great that it has worked for you.
I’m also from Christchurch.
Thanks! And I think you’re right, I do meet people who traded their misery at home for a different kind of misery on the road. I guess that I was fortunate – I’d tried to leave the cubicle, at least temporarily, several times before so I was pretty sure that was what I wanted…
This is brilliant. I am awaiting the day until I can do the same… I did a similar thing, I left my soul-crushing NYC corporate job once before back in 2009 when I moved to Breckenridge, Colorado for 1 1/2 years. Wound up coming back, immediately recognize my error and hatched a 3 year plan (about 18 months ago) so I can shed this lifestyle for good…
I’m just about to FINALLY pay off ALL my debt ($1,500 left of $30k+) about 2 months behind schedule and am ready to swing the pendulum into a nice savings account.
In the mean time.. patience, patience, patience.
Well done dave… and great site btw!!
Hi Dave,
Stumbled upon your blog on LinkedIn, and I love it. I can really relate and am curious to read more of your posts.
.
This one is funny, although I have never had a truly well-paying corporate job, I’ve had some office jobs that I could have written a similar post about.
I actually wrote very similar break-up post in 2010, a letter to New Zealand. Since you’re a Kiwi I thought you might enjoy it. For the record, I was broke when I left NZ, and looking back now I do really love the country
http://elsbethstoove.wordpress.com/2010/04/08/time-to-move-on/
Right, back to reading your blog!
Elsbeth
Hey Elsbeth,
Glad you’re enjoying the blog! And as someone who has “permanently” left New Zealand three times now, I can totally understand the sentiment of your post! My time back there recently definitely made me love the place again … but I still can’t see me settling down there again long term.
Then again, I’m not sure I can see myself doing that anywhere.